It IS all about ME!

I dare any of you to deny it. I don't care how many of you declare that your family/kids/husband/dog/friends blah, blah, blah, come first, you are full of shit.

We are individuals. We journey into this world alone and we leave it alone. It's all about survival. We are biological entities whose main interest is survival above all else. Of course I love my husband and kids; I love them more than anything. I would gladly take a bullet for any of them without a second thought.

But my husband has this irritating habit of frequently stating "It's not all about you, you know". I usually take this bit of criticism, flip him the bird (in my mind) and humbly acknowledge that nothing is about me at all and how could I be so selfish as to consider my self interests at all.

So today I snapped.

When did my Person Card expire? When I got married? When I had children? When I was born a girl in the first place?

Ok, maybe I'm a bit of a navel gazer. I'm not above admitting that I am inherently flawed. But let's put it this way-they don't tell you to put that oxygen mask on your face first, before attempting to help anyone else, just for the sake of pre-flight entertainment.

How many women do you know that have taken this martyrdom to heart and have become haggard, irritable, stressed-out shells of their former selves? Are they honestly better wives, mothers, daughters, or friends because they have relegated their needs to the bottom rung of the ladder?

I don't know, ask their husbands and kids but make sure the biotch ever-suffering mom isn't around or at least make sure to hide potential weapons first.

I had a mom like this; she had a mom like this. I have friends, relatives and neighbors like this. It's not pretty. It's exhausting, exasperating and frankly fucking idiotic.

If I've learned anything about life since I entered my 40's it's this...it's every man for him/herself!

Put on that oxygen mask ladies, your loved ones will thank you and will probably stop hiding the knives.






Comments

I agree with you. You have got to take care of yourself. I'm stick of giving stuff up for myself all the time. Everyone needs some me time.
Princess Andy said…
if you could see me i'd be waving my fist in the air in agreeance.

if you could hear me i'd be yelling "fu*king eh, sister!".

but you can't so whatever.

i'll just give you a good ol' right on!

andy
MiMi said…
I agree momma!
It's like this, "If momma ain't happy, ain't NObody happy."
When will they understand this??!
onegirliegirl said…
You're totally right!!

I'm having MY annual girls weekend away next month and am having to hear all about "the economy" and "people are giving up their luxuries". Fuck that!! When was my sanity a luxury? Oh yeah, before the Lorena Bobbit story broke years ago {talk about knife wielding at it's finest} :)

You go, Jackie!!

xoxo ~Lisa
Hey DeMented Mom,
Props! Witty, clever and well written post! I enjoyed myself.

My wife and I share the daycare duties for our three kids.

The days I'm ON....(which basically means, I'm a husk by the time my wife gets home at 5:30pm).....are the days I just nod my head to her as I walk out the door to recapture some of myself I lost that day. If you don't feel whole, it's tough to give to others, even the people we love the most.
Sidenote: That's how my coffee addiction started, but for another time.

Your Friend,
Bring Back Pluto
"ONE OF THE GUYS"
OK, that picture cracked me up!

Just wanted to thank you for your thoughtful comment on Jackass/Jello.
Anonymous said…
I think you are a mad women because you just learned this. What you said is half the truth though. Keep searching.
Veronica Lee said…
Hi! I'm visiting from Follow Me Club. Great blog.
Thanks for the comment on my blog! I had to run over and check yours out. This post is great. It's unfortunately true on so many levels... The "person card". I love that.

Looking forward to reading more!
The Bumbles said…
Hahahaha! Love the photo! Thankless job, that motherhood. People that complain about never being appreciated are the ones that are most troublesome to me. Self-love (in more ways than one) is the best remedy. Just go and do it - don't endlessly bitch about it. We don't live in the past where women had no place but the home. Your family/spouse/friends will accept that you need to branch out and enjoy what you want - time alone, time with adults, whatever. Just frickin' do it!
yanjiaren said…
Good for you Mate.I was a doormat for years and so got divorced after 11 years because for my ex I was just a donkey and our home was just a hotel for loads of psychos that didn't even like me yet I had to serve them hand and foot. I am now remarried and although I am still quite a passive girl, he knows that if he takes me for granted and has a pissy mode for no reason..I walked once..I can WALK AGAIN! I rated your post excellent btw..
Amanda said…
Stopping by from MBC. Look forward to reading more!

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